lalala

another autistic post.

It's always hurting when you can't comfort a friend who's hurting. You know he's sad but you don't know what to do. This is exactly what I am feeling right now. It is so hard to listen to your friend when he is telling you sad stories (about himself) and there's nothing you do about it. It doesn't mean you can't do anything about it. The only thing you did was to be there. To listen. But for me, it's not enough. I wanted to hug him, saying you can hurt but I am sad that you are hurting. But the norms of the society wouldn't let me do that. So there I am, walking around with him, saying nonsense things, and I don't even know what I'm doing.
It feels like it is such a selfish thing to do. I know. I felt it. The way he said it. I know he's hurting but I don't know what to do. (Paulit-ulit na lang.) I wish I could do whatever I did when we walked towards his home one day after he was robbed. I wish I could comfort him the way I comforted him before. But I knew I did a pretty bad job. Very bad. Sadly. But what can I do? I don't know how to be a friend, a true friend. Sad but true. He is a true friend to me. But how come I can't be one to him? :(